Connection Gems

The Connection Gem of the week applies Mindful Compassionate Dialogue to situations in daily life and offers clarity and practical skills. You can find an archive of Connection Gems using the list or search engine below.

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Elia Lowe-Chardé Elia Lowe-Chardé

Reminder to Stay Grounded

In these times of acute global change, it's essential to name and engage with that which keeps you grounded and resourced. Staying grounded means being able to notice what’s actually true in the present moment.

In these times of acute global change, it's essential to name and engage with that which keeps you grounded and resourced. Staying grounded means being able to notice what’s actually true in the present moment. When you are grounded you have the ability to give your attention to the five senses. You can delight in the beauty of a pink sunset blazing across the sky. You can appreciate the sound of songbirds in the morning. You really taste your tea or coffee with breakfast. You can offer a genuine smile when greeting others. You are never far from your deepest values and your intention to live from them moment to moment. It is this ability to stay grounded that will allow you to contribute effectively to positive change.

At the most basic level, keeping yourself physically and emotionally regulated is a solid first step. This includes things like adequate sleep, regular healthy meals, exercise, etc. You can find a longer list of little things that help with emotional regulation here

Next, identify your most trusted healthy habits or behaviors that help you stay grounded and name at least three things to which you can commit to engaging in the coming week. Learning theory shows that the mind can most effectively hold three things in short term memory at a time. Thus, when facing a challenge, choosing three things to commit to for grounding makes it a doable request for yourself. These broader interventions might include things like working in the garden, doing yoga, playing with your dog, journaling, or engaging in prayer and wishes for the well-being of yourself and others. What are those three things for you? Write down your top three and a daily or weekly time in which you do them.

It may be helpful for one of those three things to be something which is mutually exclusive to your most common form of reactivity. For example, if you tend to withdraw and shut down when under stress, consistent engagement with others might be an essential thing to keep you grounded.  Or, if you tend to get frantic and controlling under stress, then perhaps meditation or yoga are essential to keep you grounded. The main thing is to choose those three things that keep you grounded and set them up in your life in a way that makes it easy for you to consistently engage in them.

Your ability to interrupt the spinning mind that generates fear, hopelessness, and anger matters. Set boundaries with media and other influences to help you maintain a grounded perspective that is imbued with qualities like hope, love, warmth, curiosity, dedication, and creativity. The groundedness you bring to each day makes a difference for those around you which then ripples out into broader change. Groundedness is the foundation of positive change. Attend mindfully to cultivating groundedness everyday.

Practice

Take a moment now to name at least one thing that you know helps you stay grounded that has recently slipped away from your daily life. How will you re-engage with this in the coming week?



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