It can be maddening to find yourself going around and around with your partner over the same issues. You need a way to break out of the dynamic that leaves you feeling disconnected.
What goes wrong?
You and your partner are suddenly disconnected and arguing about missing a turn while driving. The content is trivial, but there is something important underneath, if only you could name it.
Mindful Compassionate Dialogue helps you name the real issues and address them effectively. The real issues revolve around universal needs like: love, respect, understanding, being heard & seen, caring, consideration, trust, intimacy — to name a few. Unfortunately these are often communicated indirectly; for example, “You never listen to me!” could be more directly communicated like this: “Hearing you give me advice, I feel frustrated because I want to be heard. Would you be willing to tell me what you understand about what I am saying rather than give advice?”
“I can categorically say that our marriage is stronger after having taken your classes.”
Is this you?
You are in a committed loving relationship and want to build a foundation for it to last. Perhaps things are going well and you want that to continue. Or, perhaps you feel frustrated about getting caught in the same arguments again and again and want to trust that you can resolve conflict. Either way, you are ready and willing to engage in experiential exercises with your partner to learn new skills that will support both a secure emotional bond and the ability to honor authenticity and autonomy.
How it works:
In this two hour introduction to Mindful Compassionate Dialogue, we hope you will walk away with the following:
An experience of the power of empathy and understanding how it differs from other offerings of support such as sympathy, consoling, educating, and problem solving.
A glimpse of how identifying universal needs can release you from a stuck conflict, and help you find a new way forward.
Understanding about a major source of reactivity called "tender needs," and how you can learn to prevent and manage reactivity related to these needs.
What to expect:
An introduction to the system of Mindful Compassionate Dialogue
An opportunity to practice new skills with your partner. (There will be no small group work in this workshop. You will only be working with your partner in structured exercises.)
You won't be asked to share anything about your relationship with me or with the group.
There will be an opportunity for questions about the material and sharing about your experience of the exercises.
You will receive a handout that will help you continue to practice at home.
Understanding the online format:
Couples who opt-in for the live video conferencing will be signing in from their own location in real time, at the same time. It will be easiest to use one computer for both of you. We will be able to see and hear each other in little boxes on the screen. The technology allows the trainers to visit you and your partner in your break-out room. We will drop into the break out rooms to check in just as we would walk about the room in an in-person course.
We ask that you keep your video on for the workshop to enhance communication, connection, and safety.
You will be able review a recording of the class for the two weeks following the course. Students won't be shown on the recording, but can be heard. You can communicate via the chat function if you don’t want your voice recorded.
You can also opt to attend the workshop only through the recording. This is called self-paced. You will have access to the recording for two weeks from the date of the workshop.
Details:
Live attendance means
Arriving on time to each class (6:00 p.m. PDT).
Attending and participating for the duration of the class (6:00 p.m.–8:00 p.m. PDT, with a 5 minute break in the middle). It is very disruptive to come in and out of a single class session; please plan to attend by recording if you cannot stay for the full two hours of the class.
Consistent access to internet speeds and connectivity that support video conferencing (600kbps/1.2Mbps (up/down) for HQ video; 1.5Mbps/1.5Mbps (up/down) for gallery view).
Facility with using the Zoom video conferencing system.
Logging in using the meeting ID and password and instructions provided in your workshop reminder email.
You agree to have your voice recorded or use the chat if you do not want this.
You understand that this course might be sold as pre-recorded course in the future.
Self-paced attendance means:
As self-paced participants, you will receive the handout as well as access to the video recording for two weeks from the date of the course. The recording may take a few hours after the workshop to post.
For more technical information about zoom, you can go here.
Trainers: LaShelle Lowe-Chardé, Sarah Zimmerman, David Zimmerman
When: 6:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. PDT, September 15, 2020
Where: Online Video Conference Course
Cost $30.00
If you have any questions, please email us at info@wiseheartpdx.org
Poly, non-dyad, relationships are welcome.
Register:
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